Pathways to Parenthood Surrogate Feature: Veronica
You can read all about what it’s like to be a surrogate. Online you can find what one might be able to expect and what the process is like but the best way to learn about a journey as a surrogate mother is through firsthand experience from someone who knows.
For our first Surrogate feature of 2021, we sat down (virtually) with Surrogate Veronica. Veronica is in her second trimester of her first surrogacy journey.
1) What first brought you to surrogacy? What made you interested in becoming a surrogate?
It’s something I always thought about doing after my first pregnancy. All of my pregnancies have been super easy and I love being pregnant but we don’t want any more kids for ourselves. I figure this way I can do something I love for someone else. I know not everyone has as easy a time getting and being pregnant as I did so it’s nice to help someone else when you are able.
2) During the matching process, were you interested in helping a specific type of family or were you open to any match?
I was open to any match. I originally thought I would match with a gay couple but then that’s not how it worked out. Regardless, I absolutely adore my IPs and I’m so glad to be working with them.
3) How did you build the relationship with your IPs during your first journey?
We text every now and then. If I have important questions or information then we will set up a time for a call or FaceTime— we both have young kids so usually after the bed time circus is a good time to chat. My IPs are semi local to me so they are able to come to some appointments and that has been really nice!
4) Do you have any advice to share with prospective surrogates?
It took me a long time from thinking about being a surrogate to being pregnant so plan for a lot of twists and turns. It has all definitely been worth it in the end.
If you are inspired by Veronica’s surrogate mother story, apply now to see if you qualify to be a surrogate. We have intended families waiting to be matched with a surrogate to grow their families. Pathways to Parenthood is offering a $500 bonus payment to anyone that completes the screening process and joins our program.
Surrogate Bonus – Pathways to Parenthood
Many women enjoy being pregnant. From the glowing skin to the baby bump, there’s a lot to love about the pregnancy journey. Many people who enjoy being pregnant, but aren’t looking to expand their family, choose to give the gift of parenthood to those who can’t conceive on their own through surrogacy. Pathways to Parenthood is offering a $500 bonus payment to anyone that completes the screening process and joins our program. Since we’re always in the market for incredible women who have the heart to help create families, this program is our way of saying “thank you.”
Why Are We Offering a Bonus?
Surrogacy is extremely important. The more surrogates that we find, the more families that we can help have children – and we think that deserves a bonus! We have many intended parents waiting to be matched with a surrogate to grow their families.
To learn more about our surrogacy process, please click here!
*Your $500 bonus will be paid out once the screening process has been completed.
7 Tips For Preparation To Become A Surrogate
The surrogacy process can and should be an exciting and joyful experience for surrogates and intended parents. There are many steps in the surrogacy process and therefore many potential opportunities for disappointment, frustration, and stress. Knowing what to expect and being prepared for the surrogacy journey can help reduce the likelihood of any negative emotions and experiences. The following tips can help you have a great start to a wonderful opportunity to help others in such a special way.
Know The Requirements
There are many surrogacy agencies and fertility clinics that list the requirements/criteria to become a surrogate. If you search the topic, you will find a plethora of information. You will also find that the requirements/criteria are consistent for any surrogacy agency or fertility clinic. You can view as many websites and resources as you have time for, but you really don’t need to. Looking at a few websites will give you reliable information for the requirements to become a surrogate.
Consult Your Doctor
Becoming a surrogate requires that you are healthy reproductively and in overall good health. It is essential to have your OB’s approval before moving forward in the surrogacy process. Written approval from your OB/GYN is a requirement before moving forward as a surrogate.
Be Up To Date On Medical Care
This will be different for every potential surrogate candidate as it is dependent on health history. Examples include being up to date on your Pap Smear, and also all screening/monitoring tests applicable to your age group and health history.
Be Flexible!
As with many things in life, the surrogacy process does not always go as planned. It is important to have plans and timelines in place, however there is a good chance that you will have to adjust those plans and timelines throughout the surrogacy process. Your surrogacy agency can help you anticipate and prepare for any unexpected occurrences that may pop up. Oftentimes, the surrogacy process will go smoothly and without any hiccups so be prepared for that too!
Establish Your Support System
If you are married or have a partner that you share your life with, it is essential that you have their support for your plans to be a surrogate mother! If you move forward in the process to become a surrogate, you will likely find someone in your circle of life that may express negative feelings about you being a surrogate. But your spouse/partner cannot be one of them! Your experience as a surrogate can be an amazing journey for you and your family as you share a unique way of helping others. So be sure that everyone in your immediate family is on board. It is a bonus if parents, siblings and other family members and close friends are supportive. Get feedback from those closest to you as you are gathering information about becoming a surrogate.
Learn From Experienced Surrogates
Many experienced surrogates will share their surrogacy journey stories in a variety of ways. Some will post about their surrogacy process, pregnancy, birth, and post-birth experience on social media platforms and blogs. Most are willing to engage with prospective surrogate mothers and answer questions and give advice. Be sure to gather information from at least 3-4 experienced surrogates to get different perspectives and experiences.
Be Patient!
Every part of the surrogacy process might take weeks, months, or even longer. It is surprising how long certain steps in the surrogacy process can take! Although frustrating, it helps to consider that rushing anything of such magnitude as surrogacy could have negative consequences later. There are many providers involved; surrogacy agency, fertility clinic, reproductive attorneys for intended parents and surrogate, insurance specialists, and OB/GYN. Any of these providers may discover unknown information that causes delays and disappointments. These can be overcome of course, but not without patience, flexibility, and persistence.
It takes a special woman to be a surrogate mother! To even consider the possibility of becoming a surrogate is amazing. As with any important life experience, being prepared can help make the experience all that you want it to be. If you are considering becoming a surrogate, thank you!
Supporting Fathers-To-Be Through Surrogacy
The road of infertility is generally a winding one with unexpected twists and turns. When the path involves surrogacy there are even more steps and unknowns, seemingly overwhelming at times. Furthermore, it can be particularly hard to make sense of these emotional issues when others are celebrating milestones such as fatherhood. While each surrogacy experience is unique, the one commonality is the emotional toll on intended parents. One of the many benefits of using a surrogacy agency is the support they can provide for all fathers as they embark on their journey to parenthood.
One area that can be particularly difficult are celebratory events such as Father’s Day. The role as a Father-To-Be is important and deserves recognition and support. While each individual and couple move through infertility and the surrogacy process differently, there are some ways to help ease the struggle. Open and honest communication are vital to move forward as a couple. It may also help to plan ahead for times that others are celebrating and be prepared to handle the questions from family and friends about surrogacy, the surrogacy process or your surrogacy agency.
Some other ways to support the Father-To-Be in your life, whether it is your partner, your son, your brother, or a close friend. Ask him what he wants, or doesn’t want to do, on Father’s Day. Holidays are usually associated with family traditions that can become an emotional roller coaster when in the midst of family building treatments and/or going through the surrogacy process. Holidays can be a painful reminder of what you do not (yet) have. Offer reassurance that he will be supported in whatever he decides he wants to do this holiday.
If your Father-To-Be is a partner or spouse, one option is to plan a couples day for the two of you. While family and friends mean well, unless they have battled infertility and the surrogacy process, they really don’t get the struggle holidays bring. Celebrating Father’s Day in a different way that involves focus on you as a couple may be a refreshing and distracting way to get through the difficult holiday. When you are in the surrogacy process it can feel like everything revolves around getting pregnant. You can make this day an infertility / surrogacy-free time to reconnect in ways you did as a couple before pregnancy/having a baby took over your life.
Fathers’ Day can be a time to reflect on how far you’ve come. The journey to get to the surrogacy process likely has been a long one. The Father-To-Be in your life has probably made many sacrifices to get to this point. He likely envisions what it will be like to be a dad. As a couple the two of you can decide the new traditions you want to create once your baby arrives.
We realize there are many different journeys to parenthood. If you have considered helping a family become parents by becoming a surrogate, contact Pathways to Parenthood today and get started! If having a baby through surrogacy and/or egg donation is an option you are considering to make your dreams of becoming a parent come true, we want to hear from you! Take the first step and contact Pathways to Parenthood today. We have helped surrogates and intended parents come together in Kansas, Missouri, Colorado, Oklahoma, Iowa, Illinois and Arkansas. If you live in the Midwest, we are the surrogacy agency for you! You can contact us at 913-469-5500 or at www.pathwaystoparenthood.com