Pathways to Parenthood Surrogate Feature: Veronica
You can read all about what it’s like to be a surrogate. Online you can find what one might be able to expect and what the process is like but the best way to learn about a journey as a surrogate mother is through firsthand experience from someone who knows.
For our first Surrogate feature of 2021, we sat down (virtually) with Surrogate Veronica. Veronica is in her second trimester of her first surrogacy journey.
1) What first brought you to surrogacy? What made you interested in becoming a surrogate?
It’s something I always thought about doing after my first pregnancy. All of my pregnancies have been super easy and I love being pregnant but we don’t want any more kids for ourselves. I figure this way I can do something I love for someone else. I know not everyone has as easy a time getting and being pregnant as I did so it’s nice to help someone else when you are able.
2) During the matching process, were you interested in helping a specific type of family or were you open to any match?
I was open to any match. I originally thought I would match with a gay couple but then that’s not how it worked out. Regardless, I absolutely adore my IPs and I’m so glad to be working with them.
3) How did you build the relationship with your IPs during your first journey?
We text every now and then. If I have important questions or information then we will set up a time for a call or FaceTime— we both have young kids so usually after the bed time circus is a good time to chat. My IPs are semi local to me so they are able to come to some appointments and that has been really nice!
4) Do you have any advice to share with prospective surrogates?
It took me a long time from thinking about being a surrogate to being pregnant so plan for a lot of twists and turns. It has all definitely been worth it in the end.
If you are inspired by Veronica’s surrogate mother story, apply now to see if you qualify to be a surrogate. We have intended families waiting to be matched with a surrogate to grow their families. Pathways to Parenthood is offering a $500 bonus payment to anyone that completes the screening process and joins our program.
Supporting Fathers-To-Be Through Surrogacy
The road of infertility is generally a winding one with unexpected twists and turns. When the path involves surrogacy there are even more steps and unknowns, seemingly overwhelming at times. Furthermore, it can be particularly hard to make sense of these emotional issues when others are celebrating milestones such as fatherhood. While each surrogacy experience is unique, the one commonality is the emotional toll on intended parents. One of the many benefits of using a surrogacy agency is the support they can provide for all fathers as they embark on their journey to parenthood.
One area that can be particularly difficult are celebratory events such as Father’s Day. The role as a Father-To-Be is important and deserves recognition and support. While each individual and couple move through infertility and the surrogacy process differently, there are some ways to help ease the struggle. Open and honest communication are vital to move forward as a couple. It may also help to plan ahead for times that others are celebrating and be prepared to handle the questions from family and friends about surrogacy, the surrogacy process or your surrogacy agency.
Some other ways to support the Father-To-Be in your life, whether it is your partner, your son, your brother, or a close friend. Ask him what he wants, or doesn’t want to do, on Father’s Day. Holidays are usually associated with family traditions that can become an emotional roller coaster when in the midst of family building treatments and/or going through the surrogacy process. Holidays can be a painful reminder of what you do not (yet) have. Offer reassurance that he will be supported in whatever he decides he wants to do this holiday.
If your Father-To-Be is a partner or spouse, one option is to plan a couples day for the two of you. While family and friends mean well, unless they have battled infertility and the surrogacy process, they really don’t get the struggle holidays bring. Celebrating Father’s Day in a different way that involves focus on you as a couple may be a refreshing and distracting way to get through the difficult holiday. When you are in the surrogacy process it can feel like everything revolves around getting pregnant. You can make this day an infertility / surrogacy-free time to reconnect in ways you did as a couple before pregnancy/having a baby took over your life.
Fathers’ Day can be a time to reflect on how far you’ve come. The journey to get to the surrogacy process likely has been a long one. The Father-To-Be in your life has probably made many sacrifices to get to this point. He likely envisions what it will be like to be a dad. As a couple the two of you can decide the new traditions you want to create once your baby arrives.
We realize there are many different journeys to parenthood. If you have considered helping a family become parents by becoming a surrogate, contact Pathways to Parenthood today and get started! If having a baby through surrogacy and/or egg donation is an option you are considering to make your dreams of becoming a parent come true, we want to hear from you! Take the first step and contact Pathways to Parenthood today. We have helped surrogates and intended parents come together in Kansas, Missouri, Colorado, Oklahoma, Iowa, Illinois and Arkansas. If you live in the Midwest, we are the surrogacy agency for you! You can contact us at 913-469-5500 or at www.pathwaystoparenthood.com
Demystifying the Surrogacy Process
For those who have not experienced surrogacy it can seem like a foreign concept, so it is no surprise people have a lot of questions related to the surrogacy process. Hopefully by better understanding the common terms, processes and procedures used during a surrogacy journey, you will feel more comfortable discussing the topic. Women who make this incredibly generous choice to become a surrogate are inspired by various circumstances. Oftentimes they have seen people close to them struggle with fertility. Whatever your reason may be for considering it, remember to have confidence in knowing that surrogacy is a beautiful way for people and science to come together in helping create or add to families.
What is a surrogate? People often do not know the difference between traditional versus gestational surrogates. As your surrogacy agency, Pathways To Parenthood’s journeys are always with a Gestational Carrier. This means the carrier does not share any genetic connection to the baby she carries. Rather, embryos are created with the parents’ genetic material. Sometimes donor sperm and/or eggs are needed. In these cases, the surrogate will not be the egg donor.
How does a surrogate get pregnant? With a surrogate pregnancy, intended parents go through in vitro fertilization (IVF) to create embryos. The surrogate takes medication to prepare her body for a pregnancy, a high-quality embryo is chosen and transferred to the surrogate’s uterus for her to carry.
How are surrogates chosen? The women that come to Pathways To Parenthood come to us with a desire to help and our surrogacy agency takes pride in a thorough screening process. This involves learning the motivation for becoming a surrogate. Furthermore, we evaluate each applicant’s physical health, mental health, obstetric history, background, financial situation and insurance coverage. There are many steps that take place between thinking about becoming a surrogate and actually matching with intended parents. We help our surrogates gain as much information as possible so that they can make the right decision for them when it comes time to match with intended parents.
We realize there are many different journeys to parenthood. If you have considered helping a family become parents by becoming a surrogate, contact Pathways To Parenthood today and get started! If having a baby through surrogacy and/or egg donation is an option you are considering to make your dreams of becoming a parent come true, we want to hear from you! Take the first step and contact Pathways To Parenthood today. We have helped surrogates and intended parents come together in Kansas, Missouri, Colorado, Oklahoma, Iowa, Illinois and Arkansas. If you live in the Midwest, we are the surrogacy agency for you! You can contact us at 913-469-5500 or at www.pathwaystoparenthood.com
My Surrogacy Story
By Angela K
My desire to help another family by becoming a surrogate was with me for many years. It was something I thought about often, but I wanted to wait until I was done having my own children. After completing my family, and witnessing a close friend struggle with infertility, I decided it was time to give the gift of life through surrogacy to another family.
After doing research about the surrogacy process, I took the first step! I completed the pre-screening application with my surrogacy agency, Pathways To Parenthood. Once I completed all of the steps in the surrogacy screening process, I quickly began the matching process. My hope was to match with a couple that would provide a happy, safe, and stable home for a child. I saw that in the couple that I matched with, and I was thrilled to begin the surrogacy process with them.
There were a few steps in the surrogacy process before the embryo transfer, but eventually the day we all had been dreaming of finally arrived. We had all agreed to transfer two embryos with the hope that I would become pregnant with twins. A few weeks later we learned that is exactly what happened, we were pregnant with twins! We could hardly believe it! Seeing two little heartbeats made us all so joyful.
My surrogacy pregnancy was for the most part, all that I had hoped it would be. There were a few small hiccups, but nothing major. Having the support of my intended parents made things easier for me. Knowing I was going to help make their dreams come true to become parents to two children was always with me and made the pregnancy easier still. My surrogacy agency was also there for me to support me if I needed it. Fortunately, there was not much I needed support for! I feel so blessed that my pregnancy went pretty smoothly, and my intended parents were so wonderful.
The best day of all arrived when I was induced at 37 weeks, and gave birth to two beautiful, perfect babies. Seeing my intended parents with their children was the happy ending that I had thought about for so long!